Movie Reviewz: Percy Jackson and The Olympians: The Lightning Thief

Tonights review: Percy Jackson and The Olympians: The Lightning Thief  Directed by Chris Columbus and Written by Craig Titley Starring Logan Lurman, Brandon T. Jackson, Alexandra Daddario, Jake Abel, Sean Bean, and Peirce Brosnan based on the book of the same name by Rick Riordan.

The film begins with young Percy Jackson played by Logan Lurman and his crippled friend Grover attending a high school in New York city, New York. Percy’ father abandoned him when he was seven months old to live with his mother and later on, his stepfather Gabe, a crotchety, smelly, pig of a man played with finesse by none other then Joe Pantoliano (The Matrix, Daredevil, Unknown) which was a nice surprise. When on a field trip to a history museum, a substitute teacher pulls him aside and promptly turns into a winged beast and threatens to kill him if he doesn’t give her a lighting bolt of some sort. After being saved by his wheelchair ridden teacher Mr. Brunner and Grover they mutter abut several things that will make sense later. Grover takes Percy back to his (Percy’s) house and crashes Joe’s poker party. They run away with Percy’s mother after Grover beats Joe up and start to drive to a undisclosed location. Percy’s mother explains that his father never wanted to leave and was made to but before she can explain why, a huge monster barrels through the road, throws a cow at the car, and chases the threesome into the nearby forest. The monster in question is a fifteen foot tall minotaur that looked amazing. The three find a arch that leads onto the unsaid Camp Half-Blood, but Mrs. Jackson is apparently not allowed in. She is grabbed by the monster and suddenly turns into golden dust and fades away. Percy, being the righteous fellow that he is, pulls out a pen Mr. Brunner had given him earlier, and thanks to Grover pushes a button on the side and out pops a sword. Queue heroic music. He battles and kills the minotaur, then faints. Three days later, he awakes in a infirmary of some sort and Grover walks in just in time to see him wake up. Grover takes him on a tour of the place (Camp Half-Blood) and at the fighting arena, he spot his love interest, Annabeth, played by Alexandra Daddario. Moving on, he sees his teacher Mr. Brunner, except this time out of the wheel chair and with a extra set of limbs (He’s a centaur). Percy is told that he is the son o’ the sea god Poseidon. After a vicious game of capture the flag, Percy befriends Annabeth daughter o’ Athena and a young man named Luke, son o’ Hermes. They are told by non other then the devil himself (Hades) (played by Steve Coogan who has been brought back from the dead after being impaled upon some spikes at the beginning on Raiders of The Lost Ark) that he (Hades) has Percys mother and will only give her back when a stolen lightning bolt previously owned by king o’ the gods Zeus is delivered to Hades. Oh, Yeah, and if Zeus doesn’t get it back soon he’ll destroy the world or something, I don’t know. And so begins the craziest week of their lives!

BOOM! A surprisingly good movie. For a movie loosely based on a badly written book by Rick Riordan it WAS good. The writer Craig Titley did a good job even having written my least favorite episode of  The Clone Wars on Cartoon Network. The flow was good and the actors were also good for a group of youths. But there are some accomplished actors like Pierce Brosnon , Sean Bean, Steve Coogan, Uma Thurman, and Rosario Dawson. Jake Abel who played Luke, was my favorite character and actor in the film because he made you STILL like him even when he was attempting to kill Percy at the end. I did miss several things from the book like Dionysus, Ares, and Kronos. It kept with the story, but it simplified it. In the book, it was much more of a mystery when they were trying to figure out who stole the bolt, and Zeus and the gods were much more angry at everyone. People are saying that this is trying to be the new Harry Potter. One, nothing will ever top Potter. Two,  This was nothing like Potter in either the books or movie. On the book part, I HATED the writing in the book(s). I couldn’t stand how whiny all the characters seemed. The movie made them older, maturer, smarter and just downright better. The love story betwixt Annabeth and Percy was horribly done and when Riordan attempted drama, he fail miserably. Now, don’t get me wrong, old Rick had one of the best ideas of…whatever year the first book was released, but he could have pulled it of much better. This is a perfect example of a teen movie. I wish I hadn’t seen this when I had. The theater was packed with young teenagers and children brought by they’re parents. There is a special hell reserved for people who talk in theaters whilst a movie is playing. Sure I don’t give a care if you lean over and whisper a joke to the person sitting next to you, but you have the people who don’t even yell at the screen, just say it in a normal voice. I swear I will laugh if someone just screams “don’t go in there” at the screen at a tense part, but when you say it as if you are talking to a person in front of you in a small room where you are all alone it’s just plain annoying. You know who you are.

That will wrap up tonight boys and girls.

8/10

-james

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    • Thom
    • February 21st, 2010

    Da Blue Shadow Virus! YA YA YA!

    Hmm… No. Just no.

    • geekspawngirl
    • February 23rd, 2010

    I died laughing reading this review, just sayin’.

    I don’t know that the horrible writing was a bad thing in the book, though. I mean, the main character’s some dyslexic twelve year old who probably has very little appreciation for the written word, so if he narrated beautifully and descriptively, it would be totally unrealistic. The book’s strong point was its plot.

    And yes, the romance was crappy (in the books, I haven’t seen the movie yet) but it was cute and a lot of his readers are gonna be eleven year old girls who are looking for some cute aspect to a book that’s mostly battles and war and stuff.

    • geekspawngirl
    • February 23rd, 2010

    (and oh crap I’m going to hell)

    • geekspawngirl
    • February 24th, 2010

    Why am I going to hell? Or why something else?

  1. Cause I’m one of those people who talks during movies. A lot. Without stopping. Cause I see no other reason to watch a movie if you’re not going to give it some snarky narration.

    • I’m totally cool with snarky comments as long as they’re whispered very quietly to the person next to you and aren’t just repeating the line that the sctors just said. THAT’S what annoys me. Like, when Percy says the line “This is a pen” after Chiron hands it to him, the girl behind me goes “This is a pen!”. \

      roll my eyes.

    • geekspawngirl
    • March 1st, 2010

    That’s just retarded.

    I however live for summer movie passes when you’ve seen the crappy movie a thousand times and you and your friends are the only ones in the theater. Very loud snarky comments abound and thrive.

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